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Become more skillful

What Sacrifices Are You Willing To Make?

9/14/2017

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A client I highly regard and have known for many years recently decided to leave her executive role at her organization. I was surprised. She was very committed to her company and really loved her boss. But she assessed the situation and decided that what she wanted and needed was no longer aligned with her organization. She took a new role for a really cool company.  She will do well. Though this client’s situation is very different from mine, it brought back memories for me of when the CEO to whom I reported resigned. After meeting with the new CEO, I realized I had a difficult decision to make.  Soon after, I left my job. I received two job offers at the time, but after talking with my co-pilot (my supportive and wise husband), I realized it was time to start my own practice. To say I haven’t looked back would be inaccurate. I have, many times.  But overall it has been a great decision and a good fit for me. I always felt that everything was my responsibility, and with my small business, it truly is.
 
When we accept a role at a corporation, no matter who we are, we will need to adapt. The more aligned the organization’s mission, culture and values are with who we are and our way of working, the less adaptation that we will need to make. When we need to adapt in ways that are not aligned with how we want to lead or the values we hold, that requires a different level of adaptation. Both scenarios represent sacrifices because we are giving up something we at least like or hold dear in order to remain in our organization. When these sacrifices start to diminish our energy or the joy we feel when we head to work, it’s time to assess if the sacrifices are worth it.
 
Here are some examples of “sacrifices” that can be good for us:
 
  • Working with a boss who has a very different personality or style. If you want to become more effective with people who are different from you – this is a golden opportunity. I am not talking about a mean or abusive boss. That is beyond a personality issue and if you have read my blog for a while you know how I feel about these bosses.
  • Getting new team members who are competent but very different from you. Ditto to the above. Are you most effective managing people like you? If you want to get better, figure out what inspires and motivates direct reports and colleague who are different from you. If you learn to be an inspiring leader with a broader range of people, it will prepare you to take on expanded scope and responsibility.
  • Changes in process or projects that are different than what you might recommend but that have a lot of support from other competent colleagues. This will help you learn to be more adaptive and probably add some new tools to your belt.
 
Here are examples of sacrifices about which you should be skeptical:
 
  • A boss who expects you to work all the time. You would think this expectation is ancient history but it’s not. Some bosses work all the time but don’t expect you to – so check on this. But if they are upset when you don’t respond quickly on a weekend or expect you to work on a vacation – unless you LOVE that – then be wary.  There is way too much research about how time away from work nurtures our health, creativity and ability to innovate. So it’s not even a smart sacrifice to request or make.
  • When your CEO or company starts to make strategic changes that are against your informed better judgement (based upon data and analytics), that you believe will negatively impact business, be careful.  This can not only be bad for the business long term, but your heart as well.
  • When the culture your leadership espouses is vastly different from what your employee’s experience, and you raise this issue to no avail, stand back and assess. This can be soul crushing to your most committed people, and for you if you care about them. Consider this a sacrifice not worth making for very long.
 
Of course, there are many more examples I could give. When I am working with an executive who is unhappy in their role and I ask if the sacrifices are worth it, they often point to their very large compensation package, their kid’s tuition, etc., as if it's a prison sentence. But in reality, it is a choice. And if it goes on for too long, it can impact the things you hold most dear (and may take for granted): your family, your health and your happiness. Is a job really worth sacrificing any of those?

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    Welcome to Moira's blog. I write a (mostly) monthly post about the work of building better work places: people strategies, systems, teams and leaders. 

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